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Has she given you any feedback about that? Good luck in all you plan to achieve! We have another American Member who goes under the name of Quinn, she has just come over from the States and has starting teaching in Izmir. I'm not sure if she will see your post as she doesn't come on the forum everday since she has started working. I will definitely PM "Quinn" to see if she has advice for me. I think that is what I will end up trying to do teach english in Izmir.
Meral--her parents are not yet aware of our situation, I know that I must convert to Islam in order for us to marry no problem for me. She thinks that her parents will be accepting of us, but she wants to wait for a good time to tell them. The only trouble will be with her brother who is very protective of her--but I know most older brothers are this way Turkish or not. Thomas, the protection of Turkish girls by their older brothers in Turkey encompasses a lot more than your understanding of the same thing in Western countries.
Dating in Europe: First date etiquette
While the family may have afforded their daughter a good deal of independence, when it comes to marriage, traditional values may prevail. Looks like she may be hesitating to broach the subject with them. It would be helpful for you to read up on Turkish culture and customs. Like Clinky, I am wondering whether she actually told you that you should convert to Islam, or indicated that's what her family would at least expect of you?
I'm hoping things will turn out well for both of you. Yes, as I stated in my most recent post she has informed me that I must convert to Islam although new interpretations of the text understand it to be okay for a muslim woman to marry a non-muslim man--but I realize that this is not what I'm dealing with, it's about how her family feels about everything. She is hesitant to tell her parents, mostly because it is very quickly for us to be this involved--but I know it is difficult for her to keep it to herself as she really wants to tell them, but doesn't feel like it's the right time.
Regardless of what they say, we are planning on staying together.
She does not think that she will have to go against them, but it would mean a lot for both of us to have their support. I'm wondering if her parents are religious and that is why she has said you must convert to Islam. I lived in Samsun for 6 years until recently and people from there tend to be very traditional and will expect her to marry a Turk and her brothers will be more than protective.
Yes the Qu'ran does state that Islamic women can marry a foreigner if they convert to Islam. The reason behind that is because the man is head of the household it will ensure that any children from the marriage will be brought up as Muslims. Whilst she wants to marry you and go the US it will be very very hard for her to go against her families wishes.
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If they don't agree to a marriage they may cut her out of the family and may never want to see or hear from her again. You may think that if you do marry against their wishes that after a few years they will come round as they will be missing their daughter, but it is very rare that that happens and it will hurt her deeply as family is very important to Turks. Hopefully if you go to Turkey her parents will be willing to meet you.
Even if they are against you they won't be hostile towards you as that isn't the Turkish way. You will need to take things slowly and let them get to know you. Jacklepet71, no prejudice was intended for sure, however Clinky is right that it is expected that a non Muslim man should convert to Islam to marry a Muslim woman.
This is not just in Turkey but throughout the Muslim world. Muslim men can marry Jewish or Christian women Women of the Book but it is not allowed for Muslim women to marry non Muslim men. This is because Islam is passed through the father. There are always exceptions in life and it is possible that some people marry without the man converting but usually it is expected.
I've nothing against anyone converting to another religion to marry, that wasn't my point. I'm married to a Turkish woman, however she isn't Muslim. It's not a prerequisite for ALL foreigners to convert. My husband would have liked me to convert to Islam he isn't religious but although I'm not a religious person I couldn't go against my whole culture just to please him.
Thomas, if you're happy to go ahead with converting, there's nothing wrong with that. You will be expected to learn the basics of the religion so you'll know what's involved. We'd all be interested to know how you progress -- good luck! You need to be a member in order to leave a comment. Sign up for a new account in our community. Already have an account? This actually happened to me and it could happen to you too. He said the Tinder user, who Gothamist identified as a woman named Natasha Aponte, asked him to text her. He did, and the two started a light conversation, which resulted in Aponte telling Spencer she was interested in seeing him — sort of.
Youre cute and I want to meet you Im just too busy rn,'" he recounted on Twitter. He suspected she was "ghosting" him — making an excuse to ignore him and end their textual relationship.
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But a few weeks later, a new message popped up and he realized she was not making an excuse. Genuinely didn't think she would message me," he wrote. He told Aponte he would meet her at Union Square on Saturday, and like a good date, he showed up promptly at 6 o'clock. He said he found Aponte's Instagram profile beforehand, and saw that she describes herself as a singer, actress, and model, and that she has nearly 3, followers. This gave Spencer some pause, but decided to show up anyway. Unbeknownst to him, dozens of other men were also invited to the "date.
When Spencer arrived at Union Square, he waited for Aponte near a stage that was set up in the park, like she told him to do. Finally, he spotted his date.
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But what she did next surprised him — she stepped onto the stage, surrounded by what he describes as about people and some bodyguards. Finally, it started to make sense to Spencer: At that point, he decided to go home, saying he was "too old" for this twisted game.
Other men duped by Aponte stayed in the park. Spencer took a photo of the scene before he left, showing Aponte on stage in an all-black outfit and several men gazing up at her, some with amused smirks, others with a look of utter shock. Another person who corresponded with Aponte sent her Tinder message to the Gothamist, and, like Spencer, Aponte invited the man on a date in Union Square Saturday.
The Tinder messages appear to use almost the exact same language that Spencer described.
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One man appears to be frustrated by the woman's scheme, and starts chanting profanities at the woman as he walks away from the crowd. Another video shows about 11 men actually participating in Aponte's dating "Hunger Games. It's fair to say I love a Westie. We have ALL dated these munters. And made ourselves believe they were cute and real and awesome. Until we realised they're not all that. By the way, if you get to this part of the yarn, I want to shout out to all those unicorn mofos out there - you do exist, and you do great things and make sweet unicorn babies with the unicorn ladies.
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