Outcome independence dating

Just as it sounds, outcome independence is learning to be independent of the outcome of a situation, whether that situation is a date, a job.
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Have not tried another browser. Do you wait for her to make contact next?

Outcome Independence Levels In Relationships - The Blackdragon Blog

Or how long do you wait till you contact her for another meet up? OI is hard to gauge because you obviously care. Ok my head is spinning. If you only want her as a FB then just ping her occasionally, while actively looking to hook up with other girls. You can still like the girl but not too the point where everything you do is based around her. Guys get needy when they focus on one women to the detriment of seeing other girls. Thanks Neil, that actually sounds like good advice.

Just went on a date with a new girl yesterday. We are looking to see a topic like this thanks. Once a week would be seeing her regularly. Ocassinally is for me once or twice a month.

OUTCOME INDEPENDENCE IS TRASH

Pining away hoping the phone is gonna ring is definitely not OI! Just not too needy, play it cool.

Freeing Yourself From the Victim Mentality

Arrange another date with someone else as well, if you can. It takes the needy edge off, which gives you an advantage. A lot of you guys have been spinning plates for years. So getting some regular FB is very very new to me. My thing is why hang out with girl who tolerates that crap? You may attract Doormat Submissive Women. When your together, is she suggesting to meet up again or not? Being more dependent on the outcome of the relationship is surely never a good thing.

Depends on your age and the age of the girl.

Why Outcome Independence Is Crucial

In my experience older men need to be charming and maybe a little sweet while maintaining all their alpha characteristics. The degree depends on the audience. Sprinkle in some eye contact, sitting closely at the bar, touching, listening, OI, and boom your being invited into the back seat of her mommy mobile. After she sucked my dick she told me the umbrella was huge.

Kept sending that stupid Rhianna song. Whatever it got me laid. Thanks Neil, more girls is the answer. For the past 15years I only fucked 2 girls and one was my wife the other was her drunk friend one night. Not even for a day. Ok so more time and more girls will cure me of OI. Really good example of something Chase Amante recently talked about in an article over on Girlschase: Women want to be dominated by a man…..

Of course, they mess up a lot and fall for dominant, OI jerks, and the woman just convinces herself he cares for her. Chrome on Android makes me retype my name every time, but remembers my e-mail address.

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When I was getting started with my stuff, my internal was moderate, but I still got somewhat laid despite the fact my external game was absolutely horrible. On the flip side, there are guys in the PUA arena who are approach machines and know every routine and stack and whatever, and rarely if ever get laid.

After I got divorced, sure. Then someone who was waiting for me to break up screwed my brains out about two weeks later. After the fourth or fifth time it happens you figure it out. Its how try hards act. They have to be: They are so desperate for sex that they need to break the law to do it. Maybe, but not necessarily. I was going to post the same thing. At this point I do not get onitis or lose OI. The opposite is actually the case and due to that, I get a ton of insecurity from any woman I decide to date for a bit. Ive never given a shit about women or trying to have success with any girl in particular.

But sometimes im too far on that extreme. Ive def lost out to more aggressive guys who take action. Months and years later the chick tells me i didnt seem interested so she went along with someone else. I remember the train and car analogy in the book. No denying I felt very sad about it, but I never tried to bargain with them. So, BD, in your framework, is OI not giving a shit? Or is it being unperturbed in your actions and choices? If the latter, my OI level is very high.


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BD did mention a lot of times that feeling feelings is okay. As Mark Manson said in his book, you have to give a shit about something.

Not giving a shit at all is still giving a shit about something — how you behave and perceive yourself. You should give very few shits, and those should be very deliberately decided. Have you described somewhere in the past or in your books what steps should you take to increase your outcome independence? This book , chapter I get to fuck other women whenever I want.

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I would say it depends on the man. Every guy has specific strengths and weaknesses. After you get results meaning regular lays you can begin to work further away from your comfort zone and push yourself to improve. That was one of the first of your blog posts I ever read. It got me through a patch where I was wavering and on the verge of making some beta decisions. It stiffened my resolve and made me consciously avoid de facto monogamy since, even when my natural tendency is to be a lazy bastard. Come to think of it, a lot of men get this one completely backasswards.

Talk about swallowing the elephant and choking on the gnat! It was a Transgender!


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Gotta love modern dating! If she told you she was transgender, it speaks well for her integrity. Politely say no thanks and wish her well on her search.