Parents guide teenage dating

Tips for parents to prepare for and navigate the teen dating scene.
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Remember your struggles with acne or your embarrassment at developing early — or late. Expect some mood changes in your typically sunny child, and be prepared for more conflict as he or she matures as an individual. Parents who know what's coming can cope with it better. And the more you know, the better you can prepare. Starting to talk about menstruation or wet dreams after they've already begun is starting too late.

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But don't overload them with information — just answer their questions. You know your kids. You can hear when your child's starting to tell jokes about sex or when attention to personal appearance is increasing. This is a good time to jump in with your own questions such as:. A yearly physical exam is a great time to talk about this. A doctor can tell your preadolescent — and you — what to expect in the next few years.

The later you wait to have these talks, the more likely your child will be to form misconceptions or become embarrassed about or afraid of physical and emotional changes. And the earlier you open the lines of communication, the better your chances of keeping them open through the teen years. Give your child books on puberty written for kids going through it.


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Share memories of your own adolescence. There's nothing like knowing that mom or dad went through it, too, to put kids more at ease.

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Practice empathy by helping your child understand that it's normal to be a bit concerned or self-conscious, and that it's OK to feel grown-up one minute and like a kid the next. If teenagers want to dye their hair, paint their fingernails black, or wear funky clothes, think twice before you object. Ask why your teen wants to dress or look a certain way and try to understand how your teen is feeling.

You also might want to discuss how others might perceive them if they look different — help your teen understand how he or she might be viewed. Still, they usually understand and need to know that their parents care enough about them to expect certain things such as good grades, acceptable behavior, and sticking to the house rules.

If parents have appropriate expectations, teens will likely try to meet them.

Without reasonable expectations, your teen may feel you don't care about him or her. The teen years often are a time of experimentation, and sometimes that experimentation includes risky behaviors.


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    • Don't avoid the subjects of sex and drug, alcohol, or tobacco use. Know your child's friends — and know their friends' parents. Regular communication between parents can go a long way toward creating a safe environment for all teens in a peer group. Parents can help each other keep track of the kids' activities without making the kids feel that they're being watched.

    What Age Is Appropriate for Dating?

    A certain amount of change is normal during the teen years. Discuss what he should do if he anticipates being more than a few minutes late, and make sure he understands the consequences of being late as well. Dating violence, sex, drugs and alcohol: Remind your teen about the dangers of sex, drugs, and alcohol. Stress the importance of good decision-making and discuss how he can keep himself and his date safer. Do you feel comfortable giving him condoms to take with him?

    Decide where you stand on the issue beforehand. After his first date, talk to your teen about how things went and continue to keep the dating dialogue open.


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    As always, communication is the key to success. By continuing to use this site, you agree to our updated Terms of Service and Privacy Policy. When your child mentions dating, or a girlfriend or boyfriend, try to get an idea of what those concepts mean to them. Take note of how your child reacts when you discuss dating.

    Be aware that for many tweens and young teenagers, dating amounts to socializing in a group. This kind of group stuff is a safe and healthy way to interact with members of the opposite sex without the awkwardness that a one-on-one scenario can bring. Think of it as dating with training wheels. So, when is a child ready for one-on-one dating? Consider their emotional maturity and sense of responsibility. For many kids, 16 seems to be an appropriate age, but it may be entirely suitable for a mature year-old to go on a date, or to make your immature year-old wait a year or two.

    You can also consider what other parents are doing.

    Teen Dating

    Are lots of kids the same as yours already dating in the true sense of the word? Teenage relationships can gather steam quickly. Remember that high school romances tend to be self-limiting, but look for warning signs too. And be frank about sexual health as well. With first relationships come first breakups, and those can be painful. Be patient and sensitive, and remember that sometimes just listening is the best thing you can do.

    It can be alarming and uncomfortable to think about your child dating. If you want your child to understand your expectations and rules about dating, you need to express them. Teens are eager to assert their independence, but even though they're growing up, they still need rules and boundaries. Setting a curfew for your teen….