They call this the honeymoon stage, because in olden days we'd be married by a date and claim to have a cold, but now that you're past the stage of always.
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- Moving Beyond the Honeymoon Phase: 4 Strategies to Make Love Last
- 1. No Fighting
- Denver, CO Psychologist: Moving Beyond the Honeymoon Phase
Folks who say everything is fine often do this because the opposite is true. If you have a horrendous case of food poisoning, you tell your S. Because there are certain things the other person should know before getting even more serious with you.
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Do you have a crazy family? Are your parents still paying for your phone? One of my best friends always gushes about the first date she had with her husband. Limerence is the early phase of love, driven primarily by novelty and chemistry. The joy of discovery and the thrill of forming a new relationship are accelerated with the help of bonding hormones like dopamine, adrenaline, and oxytocin. According to a recent article by Kimanzi Constable at MindBodyGreen , there are a dozen tell-tale signs of the end of the honeymoon phase. Notable to the shift are:.
These differences can trigger arguments about how you spend your time and organize your life together. The flirting and sweet little gestures subside and sex starts to become a chore.
Moving Beyond the Honeymoon Phase: 4 Strategies to Make Love Last
Affection dwindles or becomes non-existent. For example, you prefer nightly phones calls and he communicates throughout the day via text. Or, while you enjoy rehashing the day after work, he likes quiet time. These differences start to contribute to the arguments discussed above.
As you slide into the comforts of a long-term relationship, it feels less important to maintain your fitness level. Chances are, you are also now spending less time with friends. After the sparkle of a new partner has worn off and the rush of falling in love has subsided, the real effort begins. In an effort to maintain a loving connection despite the passage of time, consider the following post-honeymoon relationship strategies:.
Brittle suggests to try and learn something new about your partner everyday.
Observe, inquire, and be intentional with the way you interact each day. Not necessarily sex, intimacy is a deep connection that includes conversation and physical closeness. Broaden your experience of intimacy together by sharing quiet moments of meditation, conversation-based dates, or beautiful adventures that connect you with something beyond one another.
- 25 Signs That A Couple Has Officially Left The Honeymoon Phase!
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Make a conscious effort to add diversity into your life together, as new experiences fuel happiness. Be honest and clear about your physical likes and dislikes when it comes to pleasure. The next part of the relationship is certainly less Disney and much more real.
Accepting their flaws, and having your flaws accepted in the same way, keeps the relationship strong. We all tend to put on a bit of a charade when we first start dating someone, either consciously or subconsciously. Then the next phase comes along and you let them see the real you.
Because nobody can keep up a charade forever, right? The big reveal might involve flaws, but it can also involve deeper personality traits that you might have kept hidden before. The early days of a relationship are often filled with games of cat and mouse.
1. No Fighting
By this time, you would have seen each other in some very compromising positions. By this stage, the relationship should be driven by care and attachment rather than looks and attraction. Some people claim that their partners still give them butterflies even after years and years of marriage. But research shows that all that stress and anxiety associated with dating someone new, whom you really like, tends to dissipate. When they leave that phase behind, that will cool off considerably and seeing their partner will be natural, not forced.
Relationships last when both people are willing to work at them. This includes having a temper tantrum in front of them, throwing up in front of them, or letting them see you in some other low point of your life.
Denver, CO Psychologist: Moving Beyond the Honeymoon Phase
And though it may be embarrassing the first time it happens, it will feel amazing to be supported through something like that. Being vulnerable definitely includes crying in front of each other. It might be particularly hard for a male to cry in front of his girlfriend for the first time because society puts a lot of pressure on men to be masculine and not show weakness. But all humans cry, and being able to do it in front of someone who loves you without being judged is a good feeling.